The Witcher (2019) [Season 1, Episode 1]
The End's Beginning (61 min)
Shown 20th December 2019
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) is the protagonist, a professional monster-hunter.
He meets Nohorn (Packy Lee -
) and his gang of thugs,
who serve the renegade Princess Renfri (
Emma Appleton
). This will not end well.
There is a lot of anachronistic dialogue.
For example, Geralt's powers and the monsters he fights
are caused by mutations ...
This may be from the original Polish text,
or from the English-language translation.
However, it may also be from poor adaptation to the TV format.
In a sub-plot, which may be the Season's main story arc,
a streetwise tomboy turns out to be Princess Ciri (
Freya Allan
). The country's neighbours,
the evil empire of Nilf-something,
invade and conquer the land in order to get the Princess.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 1, Episode 2]
Four Marks (61 min)
Shown 20th December 2019
This episode introduces a hunchbacked girl named Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
). Her father mistreats her and sells her to a witch named Tissaia (
MyAnna Buring
). Rather than sacrifice her,
the witch trains her in Magicks.
The big test is to literally catch lightning in a bottle.
Yes, more anachronisms to destroy suspension of disbelief.
The Magicians' Brotherhood, like the Witcher's Guild,
serves all the Kingdoms in the continent without political favour.
Yennefer has been earmarked to serve as advisor to Nilfgaard,
the villains from the first Episode.
However, she has ambitions of her own.
Princess Ciri (
Freya Allan
) is on the run, hiding in the woods.
Evidently she has forgotten her streetwise tomboy skills from Episode One.
She comes across a refugee camp,
where she sticks out like a sore thumb.
The locals somehow accept her as one of their own,
and give her some exposition.
It turns out that the original inhabitants of the continent were Elves,
and then humans arrived and genocided them.
This explains why a continent patterned on medieval Europe
has a racial diversity aimed at mimicking the modern-day USA.
Also, it allows for a racial oppression subplot.
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) meets a bard, Jaskier (Joey Batey -
War of the Worlds (2019)
), who tags along on the quest of the week
in the hope of getting inspiration for a new song.
They encounter, by incredible coincidence,
a gang of the elven refugees.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 1, Episode 3]
Betrayer Moon (67 min)
Shown 20th December 2019
A Witcher, a travelling member of the same guild as Geralt,
goes face-to-face with an unseen monster.
When word gets around that this Witcher fled,
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) takes it upon himself
to investigate and restore the Guild's honour.
Geralt identifies the monster as a Strigoi.
All this has in common with
The Strain
is the eastern European name.
This monster is female,
caused by a curse on her parentage
and it is the male parent who is somehow at fault.
Of course, this may be in the original books.
However, since the show's writing staff is mainly female
this might also he part of their agenda.
Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
), formerly a fearful virgin,
has graduated to display sex in front of a crowd of illusionary VIPs.
She falls victim to office politics,
as her elven ancestry is revealed
and she becomes a pawn.
To empower herself, she has friendly wizard Giltine (Julian Rhind-Tutt -
Britannia
) use his magicks to make her conventionally beautiful.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 1, Episode 4]
Of Banquets, Bastards and Burials (62 min)
Shown 20th December 2019
Princess Ciri (
Freya Allan
) awakes from a strangely magical trance
and finds herself in an unfamiliar forest.
She is surrounded by a gang of Amazonian warrior-women.
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) meets a different kind of Amazonian warrior.
The bard, Jaskier (Joey Batey -
War of the Worlds (2019)
), takes him to a royal wedding banquet.
Warrior Queen Calanthe (
Jodhi May
) spends her time whining about Male Tradition.
Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
) has her first job as a professional Mage.
She is bodyguard to a Queen who is targeted by a magical assassin.
What is interesting about this episode is that,
despite there being a plethora of anachronistic female characters,
they are actually diverse and interesting and flawed in different ways.
They are not two-dimensional man-haters.
Well, some of them are not.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 1, Episode 5]
Bottled Appetites (59 min)
Shown 20th December 2019
Cahir (Eamon Farren -
Twin Peaks: The Return
) and the evil forces of Nilfgaard are on the rampage again.
They use a shape-shifting bounty-hunter
to chase down their target ... Princess Ciri (
Freya Allan
).
Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
) has abandoned her role as Royal Mage,
and is now working freelance.
Her boss Tissaia (
MyAnna Buring
) visits her to remind her of her responsibilities.
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) meets a bard, Jaskier (Joey Batey -
War of the Worlds (2019)
), who tags along on the quest of the week
in the hope of getting some magical wishes from a genie.
The bard gets cursed,
so Geralt tries to get help from a local Mage.
Finally two of the main plot threads overlap.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 1, Episode 6]
Rare Species
Shown 20th December 2019
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) and Jaskier (Joey Batey -
War of the Worlds (2019)
) join a group of dragon-hunters on a quest.
Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
) joins a rival team,
but they all have to work together to get to the destination.
Unfortunately,
one of the teams is cheating by killing their rivals.
Yennefer's very first magical skill was opening a teleportation portal.
She even used it to escape in the previous episode.
So why does she not use it now?
Instead of taking her dragon-slayer to the top of the mountain,
she follows him on foot for the long walk up the mountain.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 1, Episode 7]
Before a Fall (47 min)
Shown 20th December 2019
Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
) is summoned back to the Brotherhood of Mages.
The Kingdom of Cintra is under attack by Nilfgaard.
Yes, this is the event that was in Princess Ciri's storyline
in the very first episode.
It seems the story-lines have been deliberately misaligned chronologically.
The storytellers may have thought they were being smart,
like the character-developing flashbacks in
Lost
. However, in the 2006 show the time-line was always clear.
This newer show just seems deliberately confusing.
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) is almost twenty years older than he was
in his storyline in the first episode.
Now he is in the Princess's Episode 1 storyline,
although he does not seem to have aged a day.
He is sidelined for most of the episode,
although he manages to leave a massive trail of bodies behind him
when it is deemed suitable to the plot.
Meanwhile, Princess Ciri (
Freya Allan
) is further ahead in the time-line.
She tries to survive as a refugee,
stealing instead of trusting people.
Her street-smarts seem to have deserted her ...
but it seems that her peasant friends just let her win
so she was never as street-smart as she thought she was.
However, she has her Silver Banshee super-scream to fall back on.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 1, Episode 8]
Much More
Shown 20th December 2019
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) is the title character oif the show,
so he should be the protagonist
and do something heroic to save the day.
Instead he is injured by a monster bite in the opening scene,
and spends the rest of the episode delirious
with flashbacks to his unhappy childhood.
Princess Ciri (
Freya Allan
) finds sanctuary with a friendly woman and her son.
Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
) joins Tissaia (
MyAnna Buring
) in the defence of the border fort.
The Nilfgardians arriver earlier than expected,
and in greater numbers,
so it is a massive battle to end the Season with.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 2, Episode 1]
A Grain of Truth
Shown 17th December 2021
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) takes Princess Ciri (
Freya Allan
) home with him.
En route they must spend the night at a castle,
the home of an old friend of the Witcher's.
The bad news is that there is a monster there.
The good news is that she is female,
so evidently it was all a man's fault somehow.
Cahir (Eamon Farren -
Twin Peaks: The Return
) is a prisoner of war.
Unfortunately for him,
he is in the hands of ruthless killers
who slaughtered the wounded on the battlefield.
He was only taken alive because of his rank -
not for a prisoner exchange,
but so he could be tortured by Tissaia (
MyAnna Buring
).
Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
) may have won the day with her apocalyptic fire-magic.
However, now she has no ability to do magic at all.
Just as well, or it would have made stories impossible
because any external conflict could be too easily overcome.
Now she is a prisoner of Nilfgard.
Worse, the retreating Nilfgardians run into
a band of murderous Elves.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 2, Episode 2]
Kaer Morhen
Shown 17th December 2021
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) and Princess Ciri (
Freya Allan
) arrive at the Witchers' fortress-monastery.
The other Witchers are all there
to recuperate for the winter.
Geralt's closest ally Eskoll is there too.
Unfortunately he gets a fate intended for a supporting character.
Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
) has had visions of a witch-woman.
The Nilfgard mage Fringilla and the elven one Francesca
have had similar dreams.
They must decide if they can work together.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 2, Episode 3]
What Is Lost
Shown 17th December 2021
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) wants to hunt down and kill
the mutated monster responsible for Eskoll's fate.
Princess Ciri (
Freya Allan
) learns the fighting skills of the Witchers.
The other Witchers do not go easy on her,
and push her to attempt their obstacle course.
For some reason they do not know that a Keep is a subset of Castle,
and that a Princess would be found in a palace.
Likewise, Geralt speaks of cemetaries instead of graveyards.
The point is that whoever wrote the dialogue
has a limited grasp of the English language.
Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
) returns to the Brotherhood of Mages.
She taunts Cahir (Eamon Farren -
Twin Peaks: The Return
), and calls Stregobor a pervert.
This is clearly a case of transference,
as she is the one who tried to rape Jaskier and Geralt.
The Elves have made an alliance with Nilfgard.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 2, Episode 4]
Redanian Intelligence
Shown 17th December 2021
Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
) and Cahir (Eamon Farren -
Twin Peaks: The Return
) have escaped from the Brotherhood,
but are hiding out in a port city.
The plan is to stow away on a ship to Cintra.
While the city guards are mistreating Elves,
this just means there is an escape route.
Someone codenamed Sandpiper is helping refugees.
Is this a Pied Piper?
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) trains Princess Ciri (
Freya Allan
). They are joined by Triss (
Anna Shaffer
), a Mage friend of Yennefer's.
She discovers a secret in Ciri's blood.
The bard, Jaskier (Joey Batey -
War of the Worlds (2019)
), speaks with a fan of his work.
The fan, some kind of strawman based on the online fanboys,
complains about the multiple timelines which caused
the non-linear structure of the First Season.
Of course, the audience is meant to side with Jaskier.
However, he is a fool and the fanboy is correct.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 2, Episode 5]
Turn Your Back
Shown 17th December 2021
In a flashback,
another party recruits a Fire Mage from Cintra's dungeon.
The bard, Jaskier (Joey Batey -
War of the Worlds (2019)
), was captured by persons unknown.
Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
) gave up her chance at escaping
in order to go back for Jaskier.
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) visits the archaeologist Mage in Cintra.
They visit the fallen monolith that Ciri destroyed,
in order to see if it was a nest of monsters.
Princess Ciri (
Freya Allan
) is still training at the Witchers' Keep.
Her bloood can be used to create a serum
so Triss (
Anna Shaffer
) can make new Witchers.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 2, Episode 6]
Dear Friend...
Shown 17th December 2021
The Fire Mage is after Princess Ciri (
Freya Allan
). Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) takes her to university,
to learn about controlling her magicks.
Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
) is reunited with Geralt,
and gets the chance to mentor Ciri.
For example,
Yenn cannot open portals herself
but she can teach Ciri how to do it.
Cahir (Eamon Farren -
Twin Peaks: The Return
) tests the Elven soldiers.
Francesca gives birth to the first Elven baby in decades.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 2, Episode 7]
Voleth Meir
Shown 17th December 2021
Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
) mentors Princess Ciri (
Freya Allan
). They get the chance to bond
while they are on the road together.
Yenn points her to Cintra,
and insists on accompanying her.
After all, this is the only way
the witch will give Yenn her powers back.
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) needs to locate his missing womenfolk.
A pity he does not bother to take prisoners,
or he could get information out of them.
Instead he reunites with some old friends.
The bard, Jaskier (Joey Batey -
War of the Worlds (2019)
), is in a jailhouse.
The dwarves from the dragon-hunt
are now working as a road crew.
The Elves have decided not to bother fighting for Nilfgard.
Since the birth of Francesca's child,
they no longer care about vengeance on the Northern Kingdoms
or liberation of the oppressed Elves living there.
Frangilla is being pushed out by the Nilfgard generals.
Cahir (Eamon Farren -
Twin Peaks: The Return
) says he is on her side,
but can they work together?
There is bound to be a doublecross.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 2, Episode 8]
Family
Shown 17th December 2021
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) and Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
) ride on horseback across the continent
in search of the Mother of Monsters.
They get to the Witchers' fortress monastery.
The bard, Jaskier (Joey Batey -
War of the Worlds (2019)
), has gotten Princess Ciri (
Freya Allan
) there ahead of them.
Unfortunately she is possessed.
Her mind is at home in Cintra,
in the pre-war era.
Her body is host to the Mother of Monsters,
who uses it to pre-emptively take out the sleeping Witchers.
In Cintra, Cahir (Eamon Farren -
Twin Peaks: The Return
) and Frangilla play host to the Emperor of Nilfgard.
This leads up to a twist reveal,
because the mysterious Emperor has not been shown before.
It turns out that, of course,
he previously appeared in the story under a different name.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 3, Episode 1]
Shaerrawedd
Shown 29th June 2023
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) and Princess Ciri (
Freya Allan
) go on the run together.
Bounty-hunters are after them.
Instead of asking how much the bounty is,
or who set it, or what the terms are,
Geralt just murders everyone -
including unarmed men who want to surrender.
In other words, he is basically just Anton Chigurr.
Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
) comes along for the ride.
She mentors Ciri,
but can only communicate with Geralt by letter.
They set an ambush for the Fire-Mage.
The bard, Jaskier (Joey Batey -
War of the Worlds (2019)
), is pulled in as bait.
Francesca and the Elves also fall for the trap.
Gallatin (Robbie Amell -
The Flash
) loses a lot of fighters,
which further weakens his loyalty.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 3, Episode 2]
Unbound
Shown 29th June 2023
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) tries to hunt down the Fire-Mage
with help from Codringher (Simon Callow -
Outlander
). He discovers that the Fire-Mage's employer
is a more powerful magic-user
who has been trying to turn other girls into Ciri.
Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
) takes Princess Ciri (
Freya Allan
) to the Brotherhood of Mages as an apprentice.
Unfortunately Ciri is as arrogant as ever,
having forgotten how it was
to be humbled by the Witchers.
The problem is that Ciri has constant premonitions of the future.
She forsees the death of a Royal messenger,
which will become important in the Season's story arc.
Then she makes thing worse,
freeing a slave at the cost of angering a warlord
and sacrificing an entire village of innocent bystanders.
The good news is that Ciri is not afflicted with premonitions
in the rest of the Season.
The bard, Jaskier (Joey Batey -
War of the Worlds (2019)
), meets with the Prince of the North.
Things are changing up there -
it used to be that the King was smart,
and listened to his Mage advisors.
Now the King has lost his senses ...
and the foppish Prince was only pretending to be an oaf.
Cahir (Eamon Farren -
Twin Peaks: The Return
) has been demoted from General to bushwhacker.
He teams up with Gallatin (Robbie Amell -
The Flash
), a senior officer among the Elves.
Together they ask the Nilfgard Emperor for promotions.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 3, Episode 3]
Reunion
Shown 29th June 2023
The trio split up again.
Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
) takes Princess Ciri (
Freya Allan
) to the Brotherhood of Mages as an apprentice.
Unfortunately Ciri is as arrogant as ever,
having forgotten how it was
to be humbled by the Witchers.
She goes to the marketplace,
where she draws attention to herself.
She also meets some thieving tweenagers
who are probably going to become important recurring characters.
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) finds a girl who has been cursed to think she is Ciri.
He takes her to a witch-woman, an old friend of his mother.
Cahir (Eamon Farren -
Twin Peaks: The Return
) gets involved in politics again.
He must choose between friendship with the Elf general
and loyalty to the Nilfgard general Gallatin (Robbie Amell -
The Flash
).
The Witcher (2019) [Season 3, Episode 4]
The Invitation
Shown 29th June 2023
Cahir (Eamon Farren -
Twin Peaks: The Return
) has been promoted from bushwhacker to General.
The Emperor puts him in charge of a special mission.
Yennefer (
Anya Chalotra
) gets the Mages to hold a conclave,
so they can vote of another alliance.
She also uncovers a conspiracy involving missing apprentices.
The rogue Mage may be responsible.
Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill -
Man of Steel
) and Princess Ciri (
Freya Allan
) join Jaskier the bard (Joey Batey -
War of the Worlds (2019)
) on a sea crossing.
The ship's captain is afraid there might be a sea monster.
Unfortunately the passengers include Jaskier's arch-rival.
The Witcher (2019) [Season 3, Episode 5]
The Art of Illusion
Shown 29th June 2023
The Witcher (2019) [Season 3, Episode 6]
Everybody Has a Plan 'til They Get Punched in the Face
Shown 27th July 2023
The Witcher (2019) [Season 3, Episode 7]
Out of the Fire, Into the Frying Pan
Shown 27th July 2023
The Witcher (2019) [Season 3, Episode 8]
The Cost of Chaos
Shown 27th July 2023
The Witcher (2019) [Season 4, Episode 9]
The Rats: A Witcher Tale
